Karma Dancing With Shadows

This corner of the world is mine where I come to write, claim my independence, feel, think and write what's on my mind in the hopes that sharing experiences of being the daughter of a Narcissist can help others who are dealing with and overcoming the obstacles to regaining true emotional freedom.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

The Lost 2 Hours

the Lost 2 Hours

can be only expressed
in metaphors
and contours
outside of context

With eyes mapping my continent,
I'm unfolded between sheets
like an early draft
My axis is rotated
front to back

deep tissue massage
sheds inner thoughts....
sensitivities are tossed
along with victoria's secrets.

Wearing nothing but a smile,
your fingers inch up my spine as if climbing Jacobs's Ladder
my back manuscripted
in hieroglyphics
I began to take Shape
and Form...
silent scriptures on my lips

You got me open
I want to close my eyes
to forget

how dizzy I am
as paradigms shift.

Tensions ease as fingertips
climb steeply up my back,
trailing down my neck
across my collar bone
leaving delicate caresses.

My hypothalamus is overstimulated.

Sweat beads my skin in little sequins
and drip drops like water
dancing over a hot stove

Tenderly, you take control
Your tongue steal my words
like a ventriloquist
suspending curses half-spoken

I'm lava yet motionless
becoming a slumped goddess
I crest and fall
into oblivion

as your fingers wade
through my flesh with lotion
erasing who I used to be.

I feel you kneading me,
needing to hold on
as my waistline is yoked
I wonder how long
can I sustain myself
as hands roam

strong, wild, and free
while mine grapple for hope

the deeper you went
minutes ticked
hands surpassed time
at the peak of intensity
I lose touch with the world.
stars realign
in two hours splendidly spent.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Somethin's a lil' fishy

Why do people say tuna fish? We already know it’s a fish. I never hear anyone say halibut fish or cod fish or swordfish fish.

And yet, I luvvvz a good ol' tuna fish sammich. It's healthy AND dee-lishus!

Maybe someone can help me out on this one.

Sunday, July 15, 2012


LISTEN and SILENT are spelled with the same letters.

just something from the Hmmm...Files

Friday, July 13, 2012

Getting my sexy back

Getting ready to activate my sexy again. I'll confess I haven't been up to my one hundred percent beautiful self.
I'm ready to reclaim my whole-ness, because after taking a hiatus to do inner emotional work in that time, my fashion style transformed as well.
I'm having a time, crafting a style that aligns with the extra dose of confidence I've gained. Now I dress according to how I feel rather than going with convention.

But I can show better than tell so...

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Wonky Wednesday

Normally I don't address personal issues here but in keeping with the idea of complete honesty and disclosure, I feel the need to purge ish that's been held too long inside my mind and releasing these thoughts will hopefully release the negative energy that's clouding my ability to focus on the positive things going on in my life.

I can't stand my new boss. I don't like the way she look, talk, act, carry or handle herself in regards to supervising. More about her later...

It was one of those days at work....book on deck, and already late to the printer, and dealing with my spineless boss who uses her manager for a mouthpiece to issue directives. Now, I have no problem with orders, but when YOU ask me if I need help and I tell you "no", then you take matters into your own hands and divvie up my work, then 'I' have problem. You're so panic-stricken and stressed out wondering about my competentcy in finishing the job, but YOU, in your crisis-mode, forget that I'm only one half of the equation.
You wanted my word that the work would be finished by a certain hour and because you're new to the workflow, you figured that the other people handling their part would be responsive and timely, which is rare.

Undermining my competency in completing MY PART OF THE WORK, still didn't guarantee meeting the deadline. Doh? Not only did the book miss deadline, it went past two days.
In this business, time is money. Lots and lots of it. Missing one day is pushing it, but two days means someone gon have sum 'splainin' ta do...uh huh.

Thanks to your involved non-involvement, you let emails get past you, you barked up the wrong tree (me) and you spread the work of one to three and I believe with the type of work I do, the less hands touching the work, the better off it is.  Too many hands in the pot makes for a bad stew.

So I guess your little strong arm tactics backfired and I curious to see how you're gonna spin a tale of how you dropped the ball because I'm guessing you have something to prove to your boss. I'm sure somewhere in that tale, I'll be thrown under the bus because its easier the owning your part...sooooo

I'm in a better place emotionally reflecting back. At the time, I was ready to offer up a few choice comments but I know my mouth has a tendency to come out the bag, especially when I feel disrespected and I really believe you wanted to try me.
Sometimes, I'm learning, its better to play along and let shit play out rather than letting myself get bent out of shape because she doesn't have a clue about the work process.

It's just like a new boss to wanna come in and change shit up that's been working fine. Why they do that? Learn the shit first before you come all up in here issuing demands.

Bitch please.

You will most likely never get my respect until you can speak without having it be "boss said this...and boss said that"

Like I said, grow a fucking spine already.

Dancing with Shadows

My photo
a mix of 'tude...fortitude, solitude and attitude. I have an unhealthy addiction to intelligent, free-thinkers, red vine licorice, vitamin water, raw carrots and sitting on my back porch with a good book becoming one with nature